Married Then Divorced
(Click here for the cutest LDS love story ever!)
I am not a professional counselor and my ideas and thoughts are strickly my opinion based on my experience. It is not my intent to replace the counsel given by priesthood leaders, only to offer an encouraging voice for LDS members facing divorce issues.
But, I am a divorce survivor! Actually, I'll take it beyond that; not only did I survive divorce, but my life began to thrive after I made the very difficult decision to get divorced. Here's how it happened:
Long before the dissolution of my own marriage I made the connection that part of what allows us to grow in becoming a Christ-like people is learning to handle the tough stuff that comes into our lives. That is why, when things got rocky in my marriage, I rallied my convictions and was determined to survive the storms raging in my relationship.
I resisted divorce for twenty-five years, and struggled tremendously during that time, but I recall the moment I knew the Lord had happiness in my future and that it was time for me to move forward. What relief! I felt strongly that the marriage union--though often challenging--was never meant to be miserable, so I gathered my courage and filed for divorce.
Since that time, both he and I have been much happier and I know that I, personally, have found much love and real meaning in a new relationship with a faithful and supportive priesthood holder. I didn't know it could be so easy to be happily married!
For much of my adult life, I have tried to give back to the Lord in service to others. "Lifting up the hands that hang down and strengthening the feeble knees" has been my motto and I have done my very best to help those around me who can use a little support.
Interestingly enough, this willingness to help others was also key in helping me experience a quick divorce recovery. Looking around for someone else to assist and support, at a time in my life when my needs were so great, was instrumental in allowing me to heal quickly and move ahead with my life.
Divorce Support Online
It was in that spirit that I got online one day and googled "LDS divorce support" to discover there really wasn't much there for LDS folks coping with divorce. Having successfully navigated the break-up of my own marriage, while staying active in church, I decided perhaps I might have some ideas to contribute on the subject.
That's when I decided to create a website that would offer help and encouragement for good people who are coping with the difficulties of divorce and looking for divorce recovery.
During my divorce recovery, I learned that it truly is "darkest before the dawn", that "time really does heal all wounds", and that it is "better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all". After all, isn't life all about learning to deal with our experiences? And the most important thing about experience is not that we always control it, but that we don't let our negative experiences destroy our faith.
The moment we truly understand that we choose the quality of our life when we consciously choose our attitude is when challenges cease to have power over us. As we apply this principle to the experience of divorce recovery, we come to realize that we can choose to look at divorce as a wonderful new birth.
Within five years of my divorce, I was remarried to a wonderful, worthy priesthood holder, living in a lovely, warm-spirited home, and enjoying the blessing of serving with all my heart and energy in a church calling I loved. My family was given the opportunity to rest, heal, and grow--wipe the slate clean, if you will--and start anew. Today we are all happy and have moved beyond the trauma of divorce.
I'm excited for you! Though you may have days of sorrow ahead, you have much to look forward to.
Enjoy the pages of this support website, created to help you and your family members, as you pilot your way into the days ahead. But remember, I am not a professional counsel and my thoughts and ideas do not replace the advice and counsel of your loving priesthood leaders.
My prayer for you is that as you search for divorce support, you'll maintain hope that there are many bright and sunny dawns coming your way!
Download (for free!) the first chapter of my book, "Clicking on a Miracle" and find out just how wonderful life can turn out after divorce!
Lots of love,