Divorce and Your Self-Esteem

Salli's Divorce Support Blog

So, my question to you today is: Will the fact that you are now divorced be a defining factor in how you see yourself for the rest of your life?

Naturally, the experience of divorce will forever be a part of your history; but is it necessary to classify yourself as "divorced" simply because you had that experience?

A wise man once told me: "A lot of things happen to us in life that are not a reflection of who we are. Those experiences are separate from us; they are not an extension of us. But our experience can be a very effective teacher; we can learn important truths from the events that happen to us. But keep the occurences of your life separate from your identity. Only allow what you learn from those experiences to define you."

So what did I learn from divorce? Here are just a few truths I gleaned:

·     Heavenly Father uses a variety of life situations to answer our prayers; sometimes that comes in the form of divorce.

·     Preserving our dignity is important to the Lord ultimately, but He often uses undignified conditions to strengthen and build our character.

·     The very fact that we are often overrun with "undignified" situations (divorce, job loss, health issues, lack of money, helplessness--even giving birth can be rather unbecoming!), allows us opportunity, in the face of embarrassment, shame, guilt, loss of self-esteem and reputation, to rise above the depths of self-defeat.

·     I learned, when I was down, to remember my divine inheritance, my royal birth; and rejoice in the fact that I am a child of God, a daughter of a King.

It sounds a little melodramatic, I guess...but it's true!


Add a comment

View All


My name is Salli.

Divorced and full of fret and regret, I found my 'Reason for Living' on the internet. Now, my life is lots of fun, married in Portland, Oregon.

Clicking on a Miracle

Salli's Love Story

Clicking On A Miracle proves even when your heart is broken, your dreams can still come true.

Read my story »

Search search

Mailing List Signup weekly quote

Resources resources (view all)