Relax, LDS Divorced Parents

Salli's Divorce Support Blog

I was reading an entry in my journal the other day written during my former divorce days. I felt a keen responsibility to my children to set a good example, as I wrote:

"So many thoughts, so many areas of concern. I never anticipated that someday I would be a single parent in a home where the full burden of setting a good example to my kids, of living the gospel, would be on my shoulders alone. I so much want to set a pattern they can follow.

"I want them to see me in church, paying my tithing, doing my visiting teaching, studying the scriptures, serving my fellow beings, praying...

"I want them to see me humble but courageous, submissive to the Lord but bold in my ambition, tender but strong, content but ever moving forward."

Wow! Reading that brought tears to my eyes. What a burden we carry as single parents!

Now ten years later, I have the benefit of 20/20 hindsight.

No, I wasn't 100% of what I wanted to be for my children during the course of my singlehood, but I was sincere in my desire to be as much as I could be for them; and I believe that is all that was necessary.

As adults, my children are sympathetic to what I endured as I finished raising them alone. They are able to forgive my foibles and give me more credit than I even deserve. They turned out awesome and I survived! We made it through the storm and are better for the struggle.

If you're where I was ten years, then take my advice: relax and enjoy the journey. You and your kids are going to be fine!

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My name is Salli.

Divorced and full of fret and regret, I found my 'Reason for Living' on the internet. Now, my life is lots of fun, married in Portland, Oregon.

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