Elder Baxter's Great Talk

Salli's Divorce Support Blog

I truly appreciated Elder Baxter's talk to single women at the Saturday afternoon session of general conference. Raised by a single mother, himself, I found it very encouraging to know that a struggling woman, alone in the gospel, can raise a child that can be called as a general authority. Pretty wonderful!

Here are a few lines from his talk that I found insightful:

"Bless you for avoiding the type of companionship that would come at the expense of virtue and discipleship."

Doesn't it feel good to hear someone acknowledge that no righteous person would choose divorce unless staying in the marriage would be a detriment to the well-being of the members of the family? Such is often the case. Sometimes, to do the will of the Lord, you must cut off dead branches that are damaging the family tree.

"Although you may at times have asked, why me? it is through the hardships of life that we grow toward godhood as our character is shaped in the crucible of affliction, as the events of life take place while God respects the agency of man. As Elder Neal A. Maxwell commented, we cannot do all the sums or make it all add up because “we do not have all the numbers.”

When we marry in good faith, after praying and feeling good about our decision, it can be a hugely confusing issue to realize at some point that divorce is the next step.

Because of the agency of all the Lord's children, sometimes life just doesn't seem to make sense.

"This is not exactly what you hoped or planned, prayed for or expected, when you started out years ago. Your journey through life has had bumps, detours, twists, and turns, mostly as the result of life in a fallen world that is meant to be a place of proving and testing."

I find much comfort in knowing that the Lord knows the end from the beginning and always knew His single adult members would "come to this place at this time" ( D&C 6: 14), despite the fact, in many cases, they did nothing wrong. Life's lessons come in many forms and are meant to shape and form us in a fashion suitable to the Lord.

Thank you, Elder Baxter, for sharing your experience and thoughts about a topic very close to many hearts!


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My name is Salli.

Divorced and full of fret and regret, I found my 'Reason for Living' on the internet. Now, my life is lots of fun, married in Portland, Oregon.

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