"It's Better to Have Loved and Lost..."
Since we've all been divorced on this site, perhaps its okay to discuss our failed marriage since it can--at times--hover like a ghost in the background of our lives.
I'll go first. : )
I wonder sometimes if people who haven't been divorced feel that those of us who have been somehow didn't make the correct choice the first time around. I wonder if they believe we didn't follow the spirit when we were choosing our mate, or that we were not wise, or that we weren't living worthily at the time.
Personally, I was as deserving and striving for what is right, as any young woman can be at that stage in life. When my temple worthy suitor asked me to marry him, I asked for some ponder time and I preceeded to fast and pray for two days. I wanted to give that young man the answer I knew the Lord wanted me to give!
And the answer was, "YES!" I still remember what the spirit whispered to me during those prayerful days:
We would be a good match and would both learn things that would help us gain our exaltation. That sounded good to me! So, I told that young man, "YES!" and off we soared into the next 25 years of our lives.
But though it didn't turn out the way I thought it would, I know the Lord didn't lie when He said we would learn things that would aid in our exaltation. I learned principles I may never have completely understood, if it had not been for the opposition I experienced for so long. I relied on the Lord many times when there was no one else to carry me.
Would I trade those tutorial years? Not for anything. I had a chance, for twenty-five years, to put my best efforts into a worthy cause that ended, unfortunately, not the way I intended. But, you know, I had the chance to work, and try, and pray, and hope when events seldom seemed to go the way I thought they should.
That takes strength! That takes commitment! That takes faith!
Who was it that said, "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"? Alfred Lord Tennyson? I agree with him. I know I'm a better person for my struggle; and though I didn't get to enjoy the sweet savor of success my first time around, that experience makes my second time around so much easier, so much sweeter, and oh, so much more satisfying. I wouldn't change a thing!