Choosing Honesty and Responsibility As You Go Through Divorce

Salli's Divorce Support Blog


Choosing Honesty and Responsibility Over Being a Victim


"If you really want to survive the emotional wounds of divorce and create a new life, then you will need to choose being totally responsible over being a victim. When you perceive or label yourself a victim, you give away all control and power. You hinder yourself from moving forward into a new life. Victims choose to excuse themselves of any responsibility by blaming someone else for their circumstances. It's much easier to scapegoat someone else than it is to own personal responsibility. The cost to you is that you are left with no power, as the responsibility is someone else's. You have control and power over only one person. Realize that this is about you, not your ex, and let go of blaming them. Fixing blame is a useless waste of energy and emotion that leads to resentment. Both are toxic. Choosing to indulge in either is unhealthy and immobilizing. You will create dramatic and positive changes in your life when you take full responsibility for your life, let go of blame, turn inward and do the work on yourself. Being responsible means you have power and control over your life, however, you must choose it."

Add a comment

View All


My name is Salli.

Divorced and full of fret and regret, I found my 'Reason for Living' on the internet. Now, my life is lots of fun, married in Portland, Oregon.

Clicking on a Miracle

Salli's Love Story

Clicking On A Miracle proves even when your heart is broken, your dreams can still come true.

Read my story »

Search search

Mailing List Signup weekly quote

Resources resources (view all)