Resources
When the Gospel Doesn't Seem to Make a Difference
As I've pondered these considerations, having experienced my own divorce, there are two things I've come to understand that can be important factors in the failure of a temple marriage. They are: selfishness and agency. I’ve come to realize that if either spouse allows selfish pride to go unchecked in their choices and actions (toward their family members or in their individual lives), while consistently diminishing the importance of the sensitive feelings of others, rather than opening thei... read more
When the Gospel Doesn't Seem to Make a Difference
This is a tough subject. Sometimes it seems that divorce happens in marriages despite great diligence at living gospel principles. Church is attended, FHE is conducted, family prayers are offered night and morning; and regular scripture study is happening as a family and as individuals. Not to mention that tithing, home and/or visiting teaching, and temple attendance have been faithfully performed. Some members of the Church may find it hard to imagine, but divorce can occur even when these wonderful, hel... read more
Sorry For My Lapse in Divorce Blogs!
I've had a very sick little grandson in Denver and have spent two weeks there to help support my daughter and her family while he was in the children's hospital in Aurora. He's improved now and returning home, so as the dust settles things should get back to normal. Just a note of caution, however: Our little three year-old was diagnosed with Kawasaki's Disease. As a result, his little heart has an aneurysm that will require medication for the remainder of his life. It's a terrible sorrow for him... read more
Expect the Best Case Scenario
It is not uncommon for me to receive notes from my reader’s telling me about the terrible troubles and issues happening in their lives. It can be very disheartening to hear the reality of what people face as they wade through the backwash of divorce. Divorce--and all its ramifications--can wreak havoc in your world. I recall feeling as though I was drowning in stress and sadness the first few years I was divorced. I had financial challenges to deal with as I supported my remaining children on my teac... read more
He Loves Us More Than Tongue Can Tell!
Going through divorce can leave a person doubting their worth. Because the process of divorce can feel like an amputation without anesthesia, it's not uncommon that a person might be left feeling emotionally shattered and physically spent. But it can be even more complex than that! Losing your sense of personal value, through the course of a marriage break-up, is another result of divorce, though one that not everyone anticipates. Divorce generates a lot of negativity that can lead to a sincere questionin... read more
Divorced Saints
Ken and I hosted the awesome Single Adults in our ward last Monday night for FHE--I gave the lesson. I chose to review Benjamin De Hoyos April 2011 conference talk entitled: Called to Be Saints. In his address, Elder De Hoyos makes a wonderful point when he says that the church bears the Savior's name, Jesus Christ, as it should, but that the title also references--and thus honors--the members of the church, too--the Latter-day Saints. Saints. That is how the Lord sees us! That is what He wants us to beco... read more
Rock Bottom
I’ve been shuffling this little paper around on my desk for about three weeks. On one side of it is a hand scribbled note. In quotes. But I can’t find who said it. Anyway, the note reads: "Rock bottom became the sure foundation on which I built the rest of my life." That sentence tells a whole story. But we hear it all the time, you know. How it took someone hitting "rock bottom" before they were humble enough to turn to the Lord and place their life in His hands. And when we place... read more
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